Here are some more hilarious Facebook Status updates that I have been using to further isolate myself from reality (Original post with over 50!):
Be kind and please share 
- has sweaty boob rash…
- is obsessed with big red buttons!
- can touch his tongue with his toe…
- would give his lefthand to be ambidextrous…
- dipped his winky in to the fountain of youth
- doesn’t like the sound of red robots…
- wants cookie
- knows two facts about frogs, and both of them are wrong…
- pee’s sitting down. Don’t judge me
- accidentally ate the cookie monster
- is off to a funkier dimension. Zzzz
- - Ive got nipples. Can you milk me?
- - Oh, there you are reality. Fancy fucking off for a bit longer perhaps?
- is awake. Weird.
- is planning on taking some maternity leave soon…
- beats a hard kick in the face
- is stuck in a contradictory paradox…
- is desperately seeking out a ‘fuck this’ panic button…
- once stared a girl pregnant…
- doesn’t come expensive.
- is super. Thanks for asking.
- will have you begging for more…
- is desperately searching online for a sarcasm font…
- is hung like a fetus…
- can judge a book by its cover…
- believes there is no such thing as a lesbian, just a woman who has never met me.
- sleeps with a pillow under his gun.
Click here for more:
http://blog.icepick.co.za/index.php/2010/05/18/best-of-the-best-facebook-statuses
http://blog.icepick.co.za/index.php/2010/08/24/funny-facebook-status-quotes/
November 6th, 2009 at 9:13 am
HA, classic!
November 6th, 2009 at 9:29 am