How To Start Your Very Own Cult

I was wandering what is required to start ones very own cult? Besides the obvious much needed manipulative leadership skills.

So after some deep meditation, I present to thee, a list of a few steps I believe are standard requirements for someone wishing to start their very own sect:

Cash/Capital - Obvious one. And a biggy. Much needed for the poisonous cocktails. The fancy robes. The website. Online advertising. As well as for the construction of the expensive, glittery, feng shui arranged, sacrificial chamber.

A Supreme Being/Prophet (with history) - An easy one. Just add a long grey beard, dashing blue eyes and a white robe. Fitted together with a fancy story of vigilantism, revenge, hope, backstabbing, mass killing, fear and eternal happiness.

Code of Conduct – A rather important bit. Usually just a combination of morals and common sense, fitted together with extreme strict prejudice. Contradictory or not, if written well, it can mean major success.

Reason – People need reasons why they should pick a particular cult, as well as much needed answers to unanswerable questions. This will hopefully provide the consistency required, to make it a lucrative business successful cult.

Loyal servants – Not your average follower. Im specifically referring to the actual sheep that cater for the leaders every need whilst preaching the Code with Reason. They will most likely perform tedious, and dangerous tasks, with little to no concern for their own life and well being. Thus its these trustworthy lemmings that usually carry out the killings, due to their firm belief in their leader. They will also gladly play “Supreme Being Advocate“.

And lastly…

A place of worship and sacrifice -  Its common practice to start off underneath an average 2 story townhouse in suburbia. Therefore leaving it fairly underground, until there are sufficient loyal worshipers to move into more suitable sanctuary. To which one can then go mainstream and rake in tax benefits.

Have I left anything out?